Understanding Communication Within The Family
Lack of effective communication within the family is one of the major factors, which results in disharmony. When there is no communication gap among grown-up children, parents and grandparents, it will vindicate the supremacy of human being species. It is not easy to reach the objective, but it is a desirable goal for humanity. The spouses need to win over the ego clashes. These days old parents are practical and more realistic in their expectations from children.
Generation-gap or communication gap
1. We talk of generation gap between parents and children. It originates from variations in preference over: music, movies, socializing habits, spending style, and other priorities in life. Generation gap implies that the parents and grown-up children don’t share life effectively. It leads to communication gap between them. More often than not, there is a communication gap between spouses, which if left unattended, may lead to misunderstandings, resulting in disharmony in relationship.
Grand-parents, Parents, and children
2. There are generation gaps, among grandparents, parents and children. We may attribute the generation gap, to inflation. The grandparents could have a lavish outing or a get-together, in his younger days, at cheaper rates. They avoid outings with grandchildren, for two reasons: first, they think these are,” hell of a costly affair… We can do better with that sort of money at home,” and second, they feel uncomfortable and suffocated in crowded places.
Communication gap with the spouse
3. Whenever there is an ego clash, between spouses, first casualty is spontaneity in communication. There is a second reason too – economic disparity between spouses.
* A financially stronger spouse is often secretive with the other spouse – more so if greedy. This results in communication gap between spouses.
* There is inequality between the spending styles of spouses, which may embarrass the financially weaker partner, while socializing, over minor issues: purchasing gifts, giving tips, and planning outings.
Expectations and communication gap
4. An old person remembers his/her parents and siblings, gratefully, but all alone, because the spouse had limited association with them, and grown up children are busy in their careers and families. We marry, to win over loneliness. Invariably, loneliness is back in old age, as a self-inflicted state of mind. We refuse to: first, give up expectations from children, and second, to forgive the spouse to let bygones be bygones – because we are incapable of forgiving and forgetting.
* In old age, parents – even if financially self-reliant – want to share their life, their old memories, the grand parents, with the grown up children. The thought process is noble, but impractical as the grown up children are busy in their careers and families..
* We had intimacy, with some relations earlier, but now there is zero communication. Realize that the path of your destiny is different. Move on with life.
* Let’s learn from animals. They groom the cubs and once the cubs are self-sufficient, they are on their own, with no invisible chains of expectations attached as bondage.,